As I have noted here, several times, we are uncharted territory. So I thought that this primer might serve as a helpful reminder of how to cope until things improve. Feel free to add to the list, and send along your thoughts for all the share.
- Hire people who will work for minimum wage. After all, in these times no one expects superior service, value for money, or a pleasant disposition from the people who represent you. Why pay more when it does not really matter?
- Hold off on any investments that will make people more productive. Keep old computers, cell phones and internal systems. No one is spending money these days so it would be a waste of resources to make it easy to deal with you.
- Refrain from using any social media. Facebook is a fad; the internet is insecure; and all the other options are only being used by kids in high school...and that is not your target market. Until they come up with something better than a fax machine, trust word of mouth to promote your business.
- Lower your prices. Being the cheapest has always been a tried and true marketing approach. Look at Apple. Their cell phones and computers cost way more than competitors and where has that got them?
- When you sell at a lower cost you can justify lowering your quality too. So see how you can cut corners. Should people not get what they pay for.
- Rule by fear; its a proven motivational approach. And it will ensure that no one troubles you with recommendations for improvements that you will ignore anyway.
- Resist external advice. What the hell does anybody else know about how to run a business. Besides, most of that advice will cost you something and why pay for another opinion. You already have lots of opinions of your own!
- Wait it out. Things will eventually return to normal. The last decade or so has simply been an aberration (look it up). Then let the good times roll again.
- If things really get tough, the government will know what to do. You can count on a bail out because they are simply flush with cash and they are in the rescue business.
- When all else fails, cheat. You have a second lifetime to rebuild your reputation.
So there you have it. This is by no means a comprehensive list but it will give that jump start you have been looking for. Oh, I forgot, you already knew all these things. You are just glad to have to have someone else confirm it for you...
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